Helen Garner Reflects on Caregiving Experience in 'The Spare Room'

In a poignant reflection on the challenges of caregiving, acclaimed Australian author Helen Garner recently revisited a deeply personal chapter of her life during the opening night of the stage adaptation of her award-winning novel, *The Spare Room*, at Sydney’s Belvoir St Theatre. The event, held on June 12, 2025, marked a significant moment for Garner, who described the experience of caring for her dying friend as 'the three worst weeks of my life.' Garner's novel, originally published in 2008, is a narrative that grapples with the complexities of friendship, illness, and the emotional turmoil experienced by caregivers. It draws on her harrowing experience of hosting her friend, Nicola, who was undergoing treatment for cancer. Garner recounted her feelings of dread as she arrived at the theatre, fearing the portrayal of those weeks would be 'gruesome.' However, she ultimately found solace in watching her story unfold on stage, stating, 'Seeing those three weeks played out on stage resolved something in me.' In *The Spare Room*, the protagonist, Helen, prepares with optimism to welcome Nicola, only to confront the stark reality of her friend's deteriorating health and misguided hope regarding her treatment. The narrative portrays a tumultuous journey filled with love, frustration, and a struggle for control over the care process. Garner admitted to moments of cruelty during this tumultuous time, expressing her anger at Nicola's denial of her condition and the emotional strain this placed on their friendship. 'When somebody’s in a trance of craziness, you want to snap them out of it – and that can make you cruel, harsh,' she reflected during a conversation with Jennifer Byrne at the theatre. Garner's candidness about her feelings of anger and frustration has sparked dialogue around the often unspoken emotional burden borne by caregivers. Eamon Flack, the artistic director of Belvoir, who adapted the novel for the stage, emphasized the significance of Garner's portrayal of an older woman's rage in the context of caregiving. This candid depiction has resonated strongly with many women, particularly caregivers, who have expressed gratitude for Garner's honest representation of their experiences. Garner noted that criticisms she faced upon the novel's release, particularly from older male readers who deemed her anger excessive, only further highlighted the societal stigmas surrounding discussions of death and caregiving. 'There’s a lot of anger in us when death is in the room,' she remarked, underscoring the need for a more nuanced understanding of these emotions. Judy Davis, a renowned stage and screen actress, plays Helen in the adaptation, a portrayal Garner found both shattering and familiar. Garner admitted her initial discomfort with the theatricality of the performance, recalling her past experiences as a theatre critic. Despite her apprehensions about adaptations of her work, she expressed her appreciation for Davis’s performance, which captured the essence of her narrative. As the curtain falls on *The Spare Room*, which runs at Belvoir St Theatre until July 13, 2025, Garner's reflections on her personal journey continue to resonate, prompting discussions about the complexities of caregiving, the emotional toll it takes, and the importance of acknowledging the anger that often accompanies it. The adaptation not only brings Garner’s story to a new audience but also serves as a reminder of the universal themes of love, loss, and the struggle for understanding in the face of mortality.